Can someone share an example of a strong college essay?

I've been working on my Common App essay, and I'm honestly feeling pretty overwhelmed by all the advice out there about what makes a good one. I know there's no set formula, but it would really help me to see what a successful essay actually looks like.

If anyone has an example (even just a snippet or summary) that they think stands out for admissions, I'd love to check it out. It's kind of hard to tell if my style is on the right track or if I'm totally missing the point. Any pointers or examples would be super helpful.

Just for background, I'm planning to apply to a mix of state and private schools, nothing super Ivy-level, but I'd still like to make my essay as strong as possible. Do most 'good' essays have a clear structure, or is it more about being memorable or authentic? Really would appreciate some clarity on this!
4 months ago
 • 
14 views
Camille Luong
 • 4 months ago
Advisor
Feeling overwhelmed by all the college essay advice is really common—there’s a lot out there! You’re right that there’s no one-size-fits-all formula, but strong essays do tend to share certain traits: they’re authentic, specific, and reveal something meaningful about the writer. Structure matters, but it’s more important that the essay feels genuine and uniquely you. Let me share a snippet and a breakdown to help clarify what works:

Here’s a great example snippet that’s been successful for students:

"I learned the value of silence when my baby brother’s colic kept us awake nights on end. Sitting on the hallway floor at 2 a.m., rocking him gently, I discovered how to soothe, entertain, and eventually wordlessly communicate. Each night taught me patience, empathy, and the art of reading between the lines—skills I now use navigating debate club meetings and tricky calculus group projects alike."

Why does this work? The moment is small—rocking a baby brother during sleepless nights—but the reflection is personal and insightful. The student connects a single, lived experience to broader lessons and daily life, weaving in personality and growth without just listing achievements. Authenticity makes it stand out.

Successful essays can have a classic arc (introduction, challenge, growth, conclusion), but some are more experimental—maybe telling the story out of order or in vignettes. The key is choosing details only you could write. For example, I once worked with a student who described making intricate dumplings with their grandmother; each step revealed family dynamics, loss, and a newfound appreciation for heritage. It wasn’t a huge event, but it was deeply personal.

Keep these tips in mind while refining your draft:

- Start with a moment (big or small) that changed you or showcases your character.
- Show how you grew, learned, or gained perspective.
- Avoid cliches and generic statements—focus on specific details and real feelings.

Authenticity and self-reflection matter more than fancy vocabulary or dramatic stories. Admissions officers read thousands of essays; yours should make them feel like you’re sitting across from them sharing something you truly care about.

If you’re worried about structure, try outlining your essay in three acts: a beginning (the situation or memory), a middle (the challenge or realization), and an end (how you’ve changed or what you’ll bring to campus). But don’t stress too much—clarity and meaning trump perfect form every time. If you’d like feedback on your own draft or brainstorming suggestions, feel free to share!
Camille Luong
Nomadic
Stanford University, BAH in Urban Studies
Experience
5 years
Rating
5.0 (5 reviews)