Is it risky to write my college essay about experiencing death?

I lost my grandfather during sophomore year, and it was probably the hardest thing I've ever gone through. It changed my outlook on life and motivated me to become more involved with my family and community. I’ve thought about writing my main college essay about this experience and how his passing made me appreciate the little things.

But I’ve read that essays about grief or loss can be really common, or might come across as cliché. Is it actually a bad idea to write about losing someone? Would admissions officers see it as overdone, or can it be powerful if it’s personal and specific?

Has anyone written about death in their essays and done well? Should I look for another topic, or is it worth taking the chance if it’s meaningful to me?
6 months ago
 • 
9 views
Camille Luong
 • 6 months ago
Advisor
Writing about the loss of a loved one is a deeply personal and powerful topic, and it’s a common experience many students feel compelled to share. The key isn’t necessarily the subject matter, but how you approach it. Admissions readers do see a lot of essays about death and grief, so it’s true that the bar is higher for standing out. That said, your essay can absolutely be memorable and effective if you focus on your unique perspective and growth rather than just the event itself.

Instead of broadly describing the sorrow of losing your grandfather, center your essay around a specific moment or turning point. For example, maybe there was an instance when you organized a family meal to bring everyone together in his honor, or when a memory from him shaped how you interacted with your community. Show, rather than simply tell, how his passing led you to adopt new habits or take up meaningful routines.

Admissions officers are looking to learn about you—your mindset, resilience, and motivation. Use the essay to highlight concrete ways you changed. Did this experience inspire you to start a new tradition with your siblings, or give back to your neighborhood in a way you hadn’t before? Did it help you develop skills like empathy, leadership, or resourcefulness? Even describing a small, vivid moment (like reading his favorite book and gaining new insight) can be more impactful than recounting the general pain of loss.

Yes, there are applicants who have written about losing someone and been admitted to top schools, but their essays stand out because they reveal something specific and authentic about the writer—not just the effects of grief, but the actions and outlook that followed. If this subject genuinely shaped who you are, you don’t need to avoid it, but do make sure the story is yours alone.

Ultimately, choose the topic that best expresses what admissions officers can’t learn from your transcript or application. If writing about your grandfather’s passing captures a defining change in you, and especially if you use fresh details and authentic reflection, you’re on the right track.

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Camille Luong
Nomadic
Stanford University, BAH in Urban Studies
Experience
5 years
Rating
5.0 (5 reviews)