Is writing about 'the college guy' a good idea for my college essay?

I’m a Yale graduate and college admissions advisor with over 8 years of experience helping students gain admission to top universities like Harvard, Stanford, and MIT. I’ve helped many students successfully write essays about influential people in their lives — and the key to making it work is ensuring the story is ultimately about you.

You can absolutely write your essay about a “college guy” who influenced you, as long as the focus stays on your own growth, choices, and perspective. Admissions officers want to learn about your voice and your journey, not just the other person’s achievements or advice.

A common pitfall with essays about influential people is letting their actions or perspectives overshadow your own experiences. If most of your essay describes the “college guy” — his accomplishments, his advice, his personality — readers won’t get a full picture of who you are. Instead, structure your essay so that he serves as a catalyst for change, while most of the narrative explores your reactions, decisions, and outcomes.

For example, you might briefly describe when you met him and the advice he gave, then focus on how you applied that insight. Did it inspire you to take on a leadership role you had been avoiding? Shift your approach to a challenge? Start a project or pursue an opportunity you hadn’t considered? Be specific about what changed for you and share moments that only you could tell.

One possible approach: maybe he encouraged you to take risks, and you acted on that by running for student government or founding a club. Your essay could then explore the uncertainty you felt, how you navigated setbacks, and what you ultimately learned about yourself — making your growth the central thread.

It’s normal to be influenced by someone older, and it can be a relatable topic, but you don’t want your essay to feel like a tribute piece. Admissions committees have read many essays about inspiring mentors, so your goal is to show how you’ve evolved because of the relationship, offering insights into who you are now.

Over the past 8 years, I’ve helped thousands of students craft essays and applications that stand out at the most selective schools, including the Ivy League and Stanford. To give each student the highest level of attention, I keep my caseload small — booking early guarantees a place. I’m currently offering free consultations for new Sundial families where we’ll review your goals, brainstorm essay ideas, and outline a clear application strategy. You can book directly through my profile.