How effective are extended metaphors in college essays?
I've seen a lot of advice online about using metaphors or extended metaphors in personal statements, but I'm not sure how they come across to admissions officers. For my Common App essay, I'm thinking about writing about my love for baking, and tying it into my growth as a person, like comparing the steps and patience required for baking bread to learning to deal with setbacks in life.
Is this something that's overdone or cheesy, or can it actually make your essay stand out if done well? I'm worried that it might sound forced, but I also know that I express myself better with stories and analogies. Has anyone gotten good feedback using this technique in their essays, or do you think it's too risky?
I'm still brainstorming, so any advice or examples would be much appreciated! I want to be genuine, but I also want to avoid any common pitfalls with this approach.
Is this something that's overdone or cheesy, or can it actually make your essay stand out if done well? I'm worried that it might sound forced, but I also know that I express myself better with stories and analogies. Has anyone gotten good feedback using this technique in their essays, or do you think it's too risky?
I'm still brainstorming, so any advice or examples would be much appreciated! I want to be genuine, but I also want to avoid any common pitfalls with this approach.
4 months ago
•
46 views
Camille Luong
• 4 months ago
Advisor
Extended metaphors can be really effective in college essays if they're handled with care and authenticity. Admissions officers read thousands of essays, and a well-executed metaphor can absolutely make an essay more vivid and memorable. The key is to make sure the metaphor feels fresh and connects genuinely to your personal story, rather than feeling tacked on or overly forced.
Your baking example shows promise, especially since it sounds like baking is a real passion for you. Metaphors around baking bread, like patience in waiting for dough to rise or improvising when a recipe goes wrong, can work well as long as you avoid simply stating, "Just as I knead the dough, I mold myself through adversity." Instead, show more than you tell – use specific sensory details and real moments, then draw a connection without being heavy-handed.
For example, you could describe a night you forgot the yeast, and how you problem-solved, or a moment you shared bread with someone and what that meant to you. Let these moments naturally lead into insights about your growth. One memorable essay featured a student who used the process of restoring old furniture as a metaphor for self-discovery, but the essay stood out because the student described unique challenges in restoration and how they mirrored personal setbacks – all in a voice that felt honest and specific to that student.
The biggest pitfall to avoid is overextending the metaphor or letting it overshadow your real story. If every paragraph is about bread and none are about you, readers can lose sight of the person behind the analogy. Try writing a draft focused just on your real experiences with baking, and then look for natural spots where the metaphor fits. Ask friends or teachers for feedback: if they say the essay sounds like you and gives insight into your personality, you're on the right track.
In short: metaphors aren't inherently overdone, but clichés and forced connections are. Use the metaphor as one tool in your toolbox, and be willing to let it fade when your real story needs the spotlight. This balance helps you come across as genuine and thoughtful to admissions readers.
Your baking example shows promise, especially since it sounds like baking is a real passion for you. Metaphors around baking bread, like patience in waiting for dough to rise or improvising when a recipe goes wrong, can work well as long as you avoid simply stating, "Just as I knead the dough, I mold myself through adversity." Instead, show more than you tell – use specific sensory details and real moments, then draw a connection without being heavy-handed.
For example, you could describe a night you forgot the yeast, and how you problem-solved, or a moment you shared bread with someone and what that meant to you. Let these moments naturally lead into insights about your growth. One memorable essay featured a student who used the process of restoring old furniture as a metaphor for self-discovery, but the essay stood out because the student described unique challenges in restoration and how they mirrored personal setbacks – all in a voice that felt honest and specific to that student.
The biggest pitfall to avoid is overextending the metaphor or letting it overshadow your real story. If every paragraph is about bread and none are about you, readers can lose sight of the person behind the analogy. Try writing a draft focused just on your real experiences with baking, and then look for natural spots where the metaphor fits. Ask friends or teachers for feedback: if they say the essay sounds like you and gives insight into your personality, you're on the right track.
In short: metaphors aren't inherently overdone, but clichés and forced connections are. Use the metaphor as one tool in your toolbox, and be willing to let it fade when your real story needs the spotlight. This balance helps you come across as genuine and thoughtful to admissions readers.
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Camille Luong
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Stanford University, BAH in Urban Studies
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5 years
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